God Responds to Ernie, Uses Loophole to Avoid Suit

As you may remember from my last post, God’s wrath was diverted from me thanks to the antics of a certain Nebraska legislator. Our pal Ernie originally filed a lawsuit against the Almighty, blaming him for all sorts of bad goings on in the world. Well, a response shewing forth god-like wisdom was sent — effectively shutting Ernie down.

The 11th Commandment

Reportedly, God straightened Ernie out by explaining that just because He gave man the gift of free agency, it does not follow that He is therefore responsible for the actions of man. In other words, Ernie’s suit is non sequitur (I always wanted to use “non sequitur” in a sentence… yes!) The response further states that the defendant is immune from earthly laws and the court lacks jurisdiction.

So there ya go Ernie. But I somehow get the idea that this isn’t going to get you out of a pretty nasty sentence come judgment day.

2 thoughts on “God Responds to Ernie, Uses Loophole to Avoid Suit

  1. Chad

    Hey Stu, long time no see. I’m glad to see that your research led you to my site! What where you researching? Incredibly handsome men who kick butt and chew bubble gum?

    Either way, hope all is well — and I’m glad to see that you have escaped the wraith of the almight, at least for now…

  2. Stuart

    Yeah, you wouldn’t believe some of the stuff I do research on. I am now an expert in nursing covers (for nursing moms), really expensive sunglasses, a few famous Italian designers, Subaru parts, and taking the boater’s exam in Alabama. Crazy stuff around here!


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